Posted by: yemenia68 | April 20, 2009

Liberal or conservative?


  1. I think, orthodox religions (specially Muslim and Jews) make difficulties to young women to communicate openly with men.
    Why is that? Is it right or wrong?
    I think that the answer lies on the fact the religious men, are weak and cannot stay indifferent to their passion and sexual feeling when facing o woman.
    A simple innocent smile from a girl, would be considered as an invitation to a relationship to a man.
    My opinion is that as long as it is forbidden by relgions to a girl to lose her virginity before getting married, it will be difficult for her to make true friendship with males.
    I am sure that all you want is only a true and simple open friendship.

    • Elya:
      I dont really think that allowing pre-marital sex is going to change the way some ignorant men view women. If anything, that will make matters worst. Besides, how would allowing pre-marital sex change anything in this perspective? We need to learn to communicate as human beings without considering the physical aspects of each other. Once men can communicate with women without being tempted to think about them sexually, that’s when I will have hope.

  2. Dear Yemenia:
    Have you asked the question: why in all nonreligious and free countries, there is no problem with the communication and friendship between men and women?

    You are fighting against traditions and the human (male) nature. You are at the same time religious and open minded, conservative and liberal. You are strong, and really can make your decisions without fears.

    But the religious male, can he behave like you? It is not possible since the physiology and temper of the males is different.

  3. well, actually i’ve a problem amost like what u’ve said
    i think for me , because i don’t allow anyone to be close to me ( as a friend) i don’t feel comfortable if i tell anybody a secret about me
    i donno
    but i wish i could have a friend
    i wish
    and i wish u also to find the friend u need.

    talking about open mind and conservative lifestyle
    actually i agree with you
    i also agree in limiting the relation between males and females
    sure , not all the males thinks about the physical aspects of the females
    but getting close to the opposite sex makes some of mmmmmmm like u lose some of your shyness or , i donno how to say it , but it’s not good.
    u or i can treat with them within limits & work boundaries

    salam alyki

  4. Elya:
    In regards to what you said about the male physiology, I actually agree with you. I know that some males will say that they have the ability to interact with females without going beyond the boundaries of friendship, but in reality, I dont think that is possible for any red blooded male. Yes, their are males who don’t act upon their feelings or fantasies, but I believe that every male will come to a point when he will have sexual thoughts about his female friend, they just do not admit to it. That is just part of their nature.
    That is why God never intended for males and females to have any kind of relationships other than marriage.

  5. na3kasha:
    Its good to know there are others like myself 🙂

  6. No, you think that only yemeni men who view women as objects, it’s because you’ve been mostly around yemeni men, bet believe me when I say that this idea is common all around the Arab world, and here in Jordan, there are still people who will refuse marrying to a woman if they knew she talked with men, and many of them are quite intellectual. People still view socializing between sexes as something wrong, and I don’t blame them since we have our own rules regarding such things, I for myself don’t see a harm with my sisters socializing with men, as long as it doesn’t take the form of recreational events, as long as this is based on studying or casual conversations within groups, and I have to confess that I only started thinking so since I came to Jordan and realized how badly a female can be perceived for socializing with men!

  7. Ulysses:
    I know there are decent men out there like yourself, who don’t regard women in a disrespectful way, but honestly, I genuinely believe that men and women were’nt meant to interact socially. That is what God intended for us. These are the teachings of Islam.
    I know that there are also Muslims who will say that it is ok to have male and female friendships, but I disagree. Don’t you think that God knows what is best for His creations?

  8. I agree that Allah knows what is best for his people, but I realized that this is not how is things going here. People now view ones who appose interaction as anti-social and radical.

  9. I would rather please my Creator than please other human beings. I know it is harder these days to be religious because people do not respect religion as they did in the past. Only God can determine your destiny on judgement day; people who will judge you today have no power over you on the day of judgement.

  10. Hi just as an FYI, the word “liberally” means generously (as in “apply the sunscreen liberally” or “I contribute liberally to this charity”) so liberally conservative can also be interpreted as “generously conservative” as in VERY conservative… I don’t know what the mainstream interpretation is, but this is my first interpretation of the expression.

    • You are actually right Nikos. I never stopped to think about the actual interpretation of my post……… Well, we all make mistakes. Thanks for passing that on 🙂

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